Horizon’s Developmental Resource Center Parent Success Cards Series
With permission from my friend and esteemed colleague, Dr. Nicole Beurkens, PhD., Licensed Psychologist, I’m delighted to bring you an exciting series of eNewsletters featuring Horizons Developmental Resource Center’s Parent Success Cards. Each card carries an important message which will help you impact your child’s development, build a deeper connection, and enable you to grow as a guide.
This week, I’ll invite you to take a step back, and consider looking at your circumstances from a big picture perspective. Take a few minutes, relax and open yourself to possibility. Please share this message with those you know and love.
Look for gold in the big picture
Having a child with ASD or another developmental challenge is not easy. I know first hand. As parents, we’re constantly being pulled in different directions; running hither and yon, at lightning speed.
Looking at the big picture can be challenging. However, making shifts in your present circumstances requires being mindful in the moment – without losing sight of the larger picture.
Over the coming weeks, I’ll be sharing strategies with you that will guide you in your efforts to make a deeper connection with your child. One productive step is to objectively look at your situation without the distraction of the daily grind. It may be helpful for you to explore the following during a conversation with a trusted friend or family member.
In order to make positive shifts, you must take stock of where you are. Before you examine what’s wrong, I invite you to step back and look at the strengths you have working in your favour. At some point, I do this with all clients, and believe me, they are often shocked at what comes up!
Let’s start with your child’s strengths. Then we’re going to look at yours, and those of your partner (work with me here!). Here are some ideas to guide you:
My Child’s strengths are: examples – sense of humour, caring, creative, intelligent, sensitive, skilled at _, fun-loving, great at sharing, loves his family, great with little children, wonderful with animals, etc.
As a guide to my child, my strengths are: examples – affectionate, patient, creative, resourceful, hopeful, fun-loving, encouraging, resilient, disciplined, flexible, determined, sense of humour, loves to _, great at _, etc.
Now, I invite you to come up with ways you can really capitalize on these strengths. Consider what you do well. Acknowledge yourself for your strengths! Put the best of who you are to good use. Use a strength to address a minor challenge at home, or to plan something that you and your child can do together.
Now, let’s look at your child, and assume that he loves humour. Create some time just for you and your child; enjoy a funny movie together, or pick out a crazy book you’ll both enjoy from the library. Don’t let other distractions get in the way; this time is about your relationship. It’s worth it! The laundry can wait!
Stepping back and looking at the big picture is a simple strategy. However, using what’s already working in your favour, in a conscious manner, can bring surprising delights! A little connecting can go a long way, and pave the way toward a deeper connection with your child.
Would you benefit from skilled and compassionate support to make your home a more peaceful place? Consider The Family Coaching Program; Short Term Coaching with lasting results! Contact me for a complementary consultation.
“Sue’s Family Coaching Program has been the answer to what we were looking for. In a very short time, with Sue’s guidance, experience and knowledge we have become more connected to our son. The challenges we faced at home have decreased considerably.”
~ Kim and Tom, Pickering, ON
P.S. To purchase your own set of Horizons Parent Success cards or learn more about Horizons DRC, visit http://www.horizonsdrc.com/store/parent-success-cards