As the ASD Mom of two kids, the wife of an Aspie, and an entrepreneur out to build a critical movement and a small empire, I know a thing or two about stress. Yep, I am surrounded by autism. Oh, I forgot to mention that we also have 3 cats and 3 dogs. We affectionately call our home the “fur palace.”
Thankfully I’ve discovered an amazing tool to help me keep my sanity in check and the stress at bay. I’m going to share all about it in this weeks blog.
Join Me Behind the Scenes!
If you just found me now, I’m so glad you did. You’re in for a great show! I’m going to let you in behind the scenes as I build a business that will fuel my mission to give ASD Moms back their power. I am dedicating my life to helping ASD Moms learn how to manage difficult behaviour, to feel competent as parents – and to cultivate a loving and positive relationship with their children.
If you’re an ASD Mom, you have found your tribe. I know precisely how you feel and what life can be like. I want to help you, and the other ASD Moms you know as well!
I established my mission mid-2017. I’ve been working with families affected by ASD in a professional capacity as a Certified RDI Program Consultant since 2006. In 2012 I earned my Certified Professional Coach designation, and in 2016 I became a Certified Emotional Success Coach and EFT Practitioner. I’m uniquely positioned to change lives, which is exactly what I’m up to.
As you can imagine, my mission has involved a great deal of time, excitement, some tears and a whole lot of planning. Oh, and stress. Lots of it.
Today I’m going to share my go-to stress reliever with you. Not only is it easy to do and versatile, it’s incredibly powerful. Especially when you use it! (We all fall off the wagon from time-to-time lol.)
I owe my sanity to EFT, and to Nancy Forrester PHD, the founder and CEO of the National EFT Training Institute (NEFTti.com) here in Canada. Nancy is one of the most amazing and real human beings I’ve met in this life. Becoming a Certified Emotional Success Coach and EFT Practitioner was a journey like no other, and a complete game-changer for me.
What Is EFT? How Does it Work?
EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques. It’s also known as “tapping.” It’s a combination of Eastern acupressure and Western Psychology. It’s a mind-body methodology — and therefore assumes that there’s a connection between our minds and our bodies.
Believe it or not it wasn’t until very recently that scientists acknowledged the mind-body connection. Intuitively, we know it exists but science was slow to prove it.
Consider this… you’re about to do something scary-as-hell, like a FaceBook Live which I’m now doing weekly. As you sit down to plan your broadcast, your mind oh-so subtly tells you that no one will be interested (Why would they give a shit what YOU have to say?) Or, that you’ll have a panic attack and hide under your desk. Our minds are so helpful, aren’t they? Naturally, as these thoughts cross your mind, the butterflies in your stomach show up in full force.
Our thoughts produce emotions – and these emotions produce feelings, which we literally FEEL. These feelings lead to behaviour or actions. Without awareness or tools to shift our thoughts, feelings, actions and beliefs we’re literally slaves to our unyielding brains. The good news is, science has proven that stress relief can be found right at our fingertips, thanks to EFT.
In today’s crazy world we’re under a tremendous amount of pressure. Throw a family and autism in the mix and voila – you’ve got a recipe for potential disaster. Stress accumulates in our bodies and without proactive and corrective action we can burn out, get sick or even come close to checking out altogether, as I did many years ago.
EFT looks Weird, but So Does an Adult Having a Tantrum!
There’s a ton of research available online. It’s now considered evidence based, and many, many health professionals are incorporating it into their practices. If you’re a research lover, visit neftti.com, emofree.com or thetappingsolution.com.
Take a moment to consider what you do with your hands when something frightening happens… imagine seeing someone have a bike accident. What do you do with your hands? We put our fingers and hands directly over the points we tap on when we’re doing EFT. Our temples, our chins, under our eyes and nose. In my view this is no coincidence.
These are the points where the meridians (energy channels) touch the surface of our skin. If you’ve ever had acupuncture, the meridians are the places where the acupuncturist puts the needles in. There are hundreds of meridians, but the ones we use for the purposes of EFT are easily accessible… they’re on the face and upper body.
How does EFT work?
Basically, when we tap on, or touch these spots… we trigger a process called Mechano-Sensory-Transduction. In other words, tapping sends an electrical signal through connections to the emotional centres in the brain. It tells the amygdala – the part of our brain involved in the fight or flight response… to be calm. After a targeted tapping session, the issue doesn’t carry the same emotional charge, and frees us up to take actions that we wouldn’t normally take or to respond in a new way. So we become FREE from being a slave to our emotions. I don’t know about you, but to me this is worthy of jumping up-and-down with glee! (Tapping can have this effect as well!)
Tapping has been proven to help with all kinds of health issues; pain, headaches to PTSD, weight loss, and especially to reduce the impact of limiting beliefs – which we all have. Too often, our limiting beliefs tell us that we’re not good enough or we’re too this or that – they hold us back from taking risks and putting ourselves out there (like I’m doing as we speak!)
The Tapping Points
Here’s a diagram of the tapping points that is provided by Nancy at neftti.com
There are many ways to use EFT. There are three main standards of EFT Bronze, Silver and Gold.
Bronze tapping is simply tapping on the points; you can do this while sitting at a red light, watching a movie, sitting outside relaxing or ANY time you’re hands-free (like talking on the phone for me.)
Silver tapping is tapping along to a tapping script. A script is written to address a particular issue, such as a headache. We literally tap on the points as we talk our way through the script. There are hundreds of scripts online.
In my Better Behaviour Bootcamp I teach the Moms to use EFT, and provide weekly tapping scripts. In September when Bootcamps gear up again, I’m going to teach group members to use tapping with their children as well. Kids respond extremely quickly to tapping! (They have fewer layers of “gunk” than we adults do.)
Note: Do NOT tap on a big issue using a script… often, you will tear up which is fine… but you may be overcome with emotion and this can lead to negative circumstances, triggering an intense emotional reaction. Stick to “annoyances” when using tapping scripts. Tapping is VERY powerful.
Gold tapping is the type of EFT done with a Certified Practitioner (such as yours truly). In a session with a client I will zero in on how the issue is showing up for that person specifically – what thoughts the person thinks, what feelings they have about it, and what behaviours are associated with it… what the issue makes them feel like they want or need to do… so it’s highly effective and VERY customized. I have used tapping to get myself out of some monumental funks that have threatened to take me down. I can’t recommend it enough.
I encourage you to watch the FB Live I did last week, in which I demonstrate how to tap!